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Soft Serve, Booze and Prizes: Why My Wake Will Be Awesome
Listen, we die when we die. That is how death works. There are people who spend their whole lives trying to “decode” or “understand” death, as an idea and as a concept, but there is...
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She’s The Kind Of Girl: A Retrospective On Some Of The Women I’ve Known
Some of these are idealistic. Some of these are heartfelt. Some of these are too flowery for their own good. Some are raw. Some of these are just sparks that burnt out too fast. But all of them, all...
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Five Famous Celebrities I Dated And The Reasons It Didn’t Work Out
My doctor recently told me that, to move ahead in my life, I actually need to look backwards a bit. He told me that the only way one can truly progress is if they acknowledge some of the things they...
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Romeo and Juliet: The Most Vastly Misunderstood Love Story Ever
To all the guys reading, do you realize how irrational, hormonal, and stupid you were at seventeen? How almost every decision you made was a poor one, fueled by confusion and lust? And for the ladies...
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Surprise, You’re Dead: The Game That Will Change Your Life
Alright guys, if you are reading this, I am assuming things got way out of hand, and I’m sorry. It started as a game, it really did. We called it assassin, and it was just something stupid we did...
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Dead Parents and Molesty Magicians: Frosty The Snowman Is One Messed up Cartoon
Excuse me, kids, but why the fuck do you all have shorts on in Winter? Christmas is a magical time of year, when we shuffle around, from store to store, spending our hard-earned money on people who...
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Five Movie Scenes (In Non-Horror Films) That Are Terribly Unsettling
Generally, the people I know will ask my advice on the more fucked up films. Even though I pretty much watch everything (except for musicals and most rom-coms), I have sort of pigeon-holed myself as...
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The Best and Worst Horror Movies of 2012 REDUX
Alright, first things first. I stand by this list. I really do. But I would be lying to you if I were to say that I expected it to be as popular as it was (200,000 hits and counting) because I...
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Fall River Follies: The Guy Who Tore His Own Head Off Ten Minutes From My Old...
Fall River is an incredibly interesting town. There is so much culture and history there, but in the same breath, it has become sort of ghetto. A refuge for those who are poor (which is EXACTLY why I...
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Jesus Was A Zombie (or) In A Single Image, Remy Sums Up Easter
I am not a fan of Easter. Do not let the fact that I have an awesome bunny throw you off. Also, do not let the fact that I AM an awesome bunny throw you off. The very idea of Easter is what? To...
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My Disney Trip From Hell Part 3: The Loneliest Place on Earth (or) Beheadings
I need you all to understand, this is the chapter I was most hesitant about writing about, because as much as part one and part two were messed up, this is a different kind of messed up. I know you...
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So Begins My Two Weeks of Terror and Horror at RemyCarreiro.com
For the next few weeks, right up until Halloween, I am only going to focus on horror. Horror films, horror books, horror games and my horrifying life. No cute lists about puppies who sound they are...
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We Are Tragedy Vampires: Paul Walker, Death, and Celebrity Worship
Let me preface this by saying anytime anyone dies, especially younger than expected, it is a tragedy. This article is not written to undermine the loss anyone feels regarding the tragic and untimely...
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5 Movies That Make You Feel AWFUL For Their Lead Character
The reality is, sometimes life sucks. It just does. Some people get shit on by life. It happens. We can all turn our heads or pretend it doesn’t exist, but it does. Hell, some of us HAVE those lives....
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My Three Years Watching the 100 Most Disturbing Movies Ever Made: A Teaser
Who goes to Hell willingly? That is the question you need to ask yourself before you read this. I have an answer, but you have to wait until the end for it. To start off, there are basically two types...
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That Time My Evil Ex Tried To Feed Ham To Satan While Naked at 3.a.m.
I am just gonna go out on a limb here and say of all the people you NEVER want to fuck over, you should put writers at the top of that list. They are the one people who actually have voices that get...
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Weekly Weird: The Train Accident and the Calls From A Dead Man
I have decided after the last weird piece I wrote was so well received, I would start doing this more regularly. Sharing stories that have baffled and intrigued me for years, but stories that seem to...
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5 Awful Things We Have To Accept About Zombie Apocalypse
I grew up loving zombie movies. They were my favorite sub genre of horror film. If a movie had a zombie in it, I was watching it. And for a good, long while, I was set in my thoughts that a zombie...
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Worst Thing Ever: That Feeling When You Know a Storm is Coming….
It stirs inside you, like restless wind looking for an open window to moan itself through. You are pacing, unable to sleep and uninterested in eating. Things are quiet, but not the good kind of quiet....
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Dear Courtney Love: We All Know What You Did
Dear Courtney Love, I know what you did last summer. Well, not last summer, but a while back. A great many of us do, to be honest. We chose to ignore the obvious for a while because it felt more...
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