For the next few weeks, right up until Halloween, I am only going to focus on horror. Horror films, horror books, horror games and my horrifying life. No cute lists about puppies who sound they are saying I RUV ROO! No rambling articles about how people misunderstood this French film, or that Spanish film. No news stories (unless something REALLY epic happens) and no rambling about sex or drugs. Well, I will still probably bring both of those things up, because I am a sicko, but honestly, tie the baby down, fireproof the dog, double lock all the doors and pray to your non-existent God, because this is the TWO WEEKS OF TERROR and HORROR at RemyCarreiro.com.
*Insert evil laugh here for affect.
Pictured: The only way I can get a sustainable erection.
To start you kids off right, I am linking some articles I have done in the past about evil, fucked up shit.
Best slasher films on Netflix right now.
Five horror films that are somehow rated PG.
The most soul-destroying film I NEVER should have watched.
Breakdancer or rapist?
That is up to you to decide.
The six most disturbing books I ever read.
Evil Dead remake extravaganza.
Best cameos from rock stars in horror films
Okay, I’ll admit it. I had sex with her.
Seven amazing horror movies more people need to see
That time I killed myself for an article.
Horror movies that pleasantly surprised me.
and finally
Under seen 80′s horror movies you NEED to see
That werewolf sure knows how to seduce a guy with neck kisses first. Well played.
So you know that creaking you hear in your attic every night when you are trying to sleep?
That sound of muffled breath in the backseat of your car while you THINK are driving alone, late one evening?
That noise on the baby monitor you SWEAR was a man’s voice?
That feeling of a cold hand against your back when you KNOW you are by yourself, yet you turn and see nothing?
Yes, for the next two weeks, that will be me.
Sleep tight, my little REMlins.
I’ll be watching….
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